Monday, December 3, 2012

Slave to Society?

So this morning after waking up and washing the dye out of my hair that i had left in while i slept :p i jumped online, the usual morning coffee routine of checking all the sites i go to and catching up on stuff, i was on twitter and saw a retweeted conversation that was going on between one of my followers and an actor dude from London who was anti sex work.

 So OF COURSE when i saw the tweet, i had to throw my 20cents worth in there but OMG it is so hard to say what you REALLY want to say in 144 characters and THEN when you have typed out a bit and you need to do a 2nd a 3rd tweet to say what you gotta say and a tweet doesnt go through blah blah. its annoying so i thought id write a blog instead lol. So there are some tweets that appeared from this actor guy and a few other randoms butting in and the conversation was going nuts lol but there were a few that i wanted to make comment on...

 Even if it's not, it doesn't matter? Don't kid yourself, no one is in that industry through conscious free choice.

No one ay? Um, yeah, i made the choice. A lot of people i know made the choice.
I also know that there are people out there who didnt get a choice, who were forced into it. I dont deny these people exist and i of course feel sorrow for their pain. No one should be forced into prostitution.

The decisions of the vulnerable, and in some cases naive, aren't exactly free choices.

 Yes that is correct. Some of the people are naive and vulnerable and that is horrible. But in the society i live in, where there is decriminalization, the majority of people in the industry are making free choices. I acknowledge that in different countries this is not the case. But if the world could use NSW, Australia as an example, a way to make life great for the sex workers who choose their job and an awesome way to make it alot harder for sex traffickers and people who are doing the wrong thing.. if the world looked at this and tried it out, i think they would get the same results and then no longer would the stereo type for a sex worker be "abused, on drugs, not by choice"

you think it's ok for people to pay for sex and or be paid. Sorry but that's insulting.

Im not insulted to be paid for a service. A service i enjoy and a service that is needed by many people in this world.

95% of actors are unemployed, including me, I've paid bills over last 2 years in London, Manhattan & LA without selling myself

 I do not "sell myself" I take "myself" home with me every night. Not everyone can be a sex worker, not everyone wants to. Just like, not everyone can be a waiter.. not everyone wants to either lol.  You find a job that suits you. Sex work doesnt suit you, but it does me... and thats ok. I respect your choice not to be a sex worker!

 do you not find it empty & soul destroying?

No, i have found it to be very satisfying. I have found myself by being a sex worker. It liberated me sexually, emotionally and of course financially and made me find my own inner strength. It brought me to this point in my life, a point where i am content, i am happy, i feel at peace, i feel loved, i feel just the way i should be :)

But if i had been forced into it, yes i believe i would feel all of those things. If i was a drug addict i might feel that way too. If i was doing this job and hating it, i would feel empty and soul destroyed . but i would feel that way in any job i did and hated.
I was lucky, i found a job that i loved. I wish everyone the same happiness!

do you respect the men who pay you for sex? Some who are cheating on wives and girlfriends

Absolutely. Most of my clients are lovely people. Sure you still get the odd jerk here and there but i met more jerks when i was working in customer service lol, compared to that, i have met less jerks in sex work. I respect my clients because when they come to me, its a safe space for them. No two clients are alike and their needs/reasons for seeing sex workers differ. They respect me, i respect them. Its a two way street.

Cheating to me is defined by who has your heart. If my partner has sex with another person, its just sex.. but if they have an emotional attachement to that person, they have feelings for that person, that to me is cheating.

 I would never advocate shaming. I think you're victims of society who should be respected and supported.

Victims of society how? The only victim of society issue i can see is that we are victims of being only known of as VICTIMS.
If you want to respect us, listen to us, ALL of us, not just the sex workers who's story is negative and fits in with your ideal of the industry. Get the WHOLE picture, not just one side.

What it all comes down to is this.... yes we ALL want to stop trafficking. Yes there are parts of this industry in some countries where trafficking occurs and we need to stop it
But how about we all do it together? All fight for the same cause. A fight in which not only the victims can be helped, but also the rights of the other sex workers are taken into consideration. We are not criminals, we should not be punished along with the traffickers. We dont want the corruption in the industry any more than you do!

Its ok if you dont agree with sex work. Thats your choice! I respect your choice. Heck i could never be an actor, i mean really, dont they kinda become a slave to society anyways......?


  1. It's funny - I'd say alot of people in other jobs, if they had enough money to survive on, would not do the work they do. Doesn't that mean they don't do that job by choice, but instead do it because they are forced to make money that way? I'd say the comment actually is quite true, it's just a dishonest scaling of the ramification - it applies to millions of people outside of sex work as well!

    you think it's ok for people to pay for sex and or be paid. Sorry but that's insulting.
    Insulting to him?

    How insulting to the rest of the world is it that if something is insulting to him, the rest of the world must change around him?

    95% of actors are unemployed, including me, I've paid bills over last 2 years in London, Manhattan & LA without selling myself
    And here it is - when someone has tough times, if they give up an option for getting through it, then everyone else in the world has to give up that option as well. The only way they can be strong and not take that option is to demand everyone be in the same boat as them. It's the old story of a victim becoming victimiser.

    Besides, as an actor, what's going to happen when a sex scene comes up? Sure, it wont be penetrative, but it'll still be light erotica.

    That said and as I refered to before, I think alot of people are shoved into jobs without a choice on the matter. I think that needs to change, whether it's a sex work job or other type of job. Of course, that's a big change, for a society that still resembles a medieval warlord and peasants arrangement.

  2. Wow, great comment! You are spot on!
    Thank you for reading and taking the time to post xxx